A Good Word for Euphemism

My dear friends Maurizio and Anna visited recently.  While we had mostly good news to share with each other, I did tell them about a few challenges I’m facing in my life. Waving his arms, Maurizio said “Challenges?  So American to call them that.  Back in Italy we call them what they really are:  problems!”  I told Maurizio that he and Anna had better start learning and using euphemisms, because after years of waiting, they recently got their US green cards.  So for the rest of the conversation, they used the word ‘challenge’ whenever they normally would have used the word ‘problem’, causing us all to fall apart with laughter.

Yes, it’s very American to use euphemisms – “good speech” in Greek.  We’re still a new country and this is still the land of opportunity.  What are real problems for others look like mere challenges to us.  While I think of myself as a hard-headed realist, not given to rash claims that positive thinking will fix everything, I must admit that I have been influenced by the culture in which I was raised.   Optimism is an American quality that I cherish.

And it would do me good to practice euphemism even more than I already do.  I’ve been pondering new ways to inject more optimism into my life.  These translations might sound a bit extreme or silly.  But I can’t think of any harm in trying them out:

Translate ‘traffic jam’ into ‘traffic meditation’.  When I’m on the road, and all the cars are stopped, I have a choice of perspective.  I can interpret it as frustration: I’m not getting where I want to go at the speed I want to get there, and I don’t like it.  Or I can look at it as a spontaneous meditation event. Suddenly, I and dozens or hundreds of other people are given the chance to still our minds and chant our mantras in our cars:  “Lord Jesus Christ have mercy upon me” or “Gate, gate, paragate, parasamgate, bodhisvaha” or “Om”.  A pause for bliss instead of road rage.

Translate “going broke” into “going for broke”.  Losing a job, running out of money, going deep into debt; these ways of telling the ‘financial challenge’ story have a way of aiming us backward instead of forward.  Clear thinking and realistic action is always needed, whether life is easy or otherwise.  But alongside practicality, optimism is essential. Often, we have many more choices than we are able to notice or see when we find ourselves in crisis.  ‘Going for broke’ means abandoning inhibitions about asking others for spiritual, emotional, and practical help in finding solutions.  It means embracing new ways of thinking and new skills for acting.  It means letting go of any attitude or habit of mind that gets in the way of moving forward.

Translate ‘waiting room’ into ‘relaxing room’.  Instead of watching the clock impatiently, it’s an opportunity for a welcome and needed break in your routine.  Time for deep breathing, for creative imagination, for intentional release of tensions in your body and mind and soul.  And when the nurse or receptionist calls out your name, you are rested and cheerful for your appointment.

Translate ‘pain’ into ‘compassion’.  The word ‘compassion’ literally means ‘suffering with’.  Now, we all think of compassion as a good thing.  But how can we ‘suffer with’ if we keep our suffering to ourselves, as so often we do?  The church is a community of compassion, where we transform pain into grace.   It’s a place to share the ups and downs of our lives, celebrating our joys and turning our struggles into opportunities to express love. Soon, we will celebrate “Passion Week”, the time from Palm Sunday to Easter, remembering the way that Jesus shared his pain, and shared in the pain of others, creating a community of compassion.

The gospel is “good speech” about the good news of the kingdom of heaven.  Jesus said that this kingdom is all around us on earth, if we have eyes to see it and ears to hear it.  He told his followers that despite the poverty and the disease and the political oppression that surrounded them, the kingdom of God was in their midst.  Faith was required to live as if divine Love ruled the world, instead of the Emperor.  Faithful optimism was needed in order to return hate with love, greed with sharing, anger with kindness, war with peace, habits with creativity, crucifixion with resurrection.   Living this faith co-creates the kingdom of God to which it points.  “In the beginning was the Word,” said the writer of the gospel of John.  I daresay the Word is a euphemism, aiming us toward heaven on earth.