Ever feel bewildered in the face of a tough choice or confusing personal situation? You are in great company. And having some of that great company can make your decision-making process a lot easier.
That’s what Clearness Committees are all about. You write down the problem you’re facing – as succinctly as you can. (You may be unclear about how to describe the situation that is before you – but do the best you can.) You invite a group of people whom you respect to gather together as a temporary Clearness Committee. You text/email them your problem ahead of time. You ask them if they are willing to follow these guidelines.
Those who agree gather and sit in a circle for between 1.5 and 2 hours with you around a phone or laptop computer with this campfire video playing. They choose one of them to be the “clerk” and take simple notes, which the “clerk” emails to you afterward. They start asking you questions. Only questions. Honest questions for which they do not yet know your answers. Questions that invite your reflection. Questions that aren’t “leading” – questions that are not round-about ways of giving advice or opinions. Questions that invite answers that will lead to yet more questions that will invite answers that lead to yet more questions.
There are times of silence, when only the virtual campfire is crackling. Times for reflection, for letting questions and answers sink in deeper. When you are ready, 15 or so minutes before the agreed-upon ending time, you ask your committee members to “mirror” what they heard and saw in your responses to their questions. Again: no opinions, no advice – just feedback about what they noticed in you as the campfire burned.
Then you shake hands with each of them and depart in soulful silence. What happens at the Clearness Committee campfire stays at the campfire – complete confidentiality.